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The Journal of Trisha De Gracia I'm sick of this bull and frankly, I want to cry.
04/02/2004 06:27 a.m.
Human cloning essay due for saturday morning. Math test on a chapter I haven't even finished on friday. chem test next week with chem as my worst subject. Leader of the pack rehersals 4 nights a week with the show in a month. Friend of the family diagnosed with cancer and given an extimate of 3 TO 6 FUCKING MONTHS TO LIVE left, taking up saturday and sunday.... I think I might cry from this. My parents give me no support. I tell them I'm stressed and they shake their fucking fingers at me like "tsk tsk tsk you should have gotten it done earlier" "tsk tsk tsk, you're managing your time all wrong" well fucking thank you. Thank you for that mom and dad. Because theres no way I'm nearly as stressed as you. I dont work all day (I just go to school from 730-5). My ex wife isn't dying (she's just been in my life as long as i can remeber). I feel like I'm going to break down. Tomorrow I go to school at 730, take a math test, go to the rest of my classes, meet the coordinator for the public speech contest, go home finish math and chem, HOPEFULLY (or dear god I might die) see Jordan or just chill by myself for a while, sleep, get up, do the contest, get my books, do homework on the way to victoria to see joanne (my dads exwife), possibly stay over night, possibly see her again on sunder, then monday do it all over again with school and theatre and homework and jazz and school and theatre and homework and school and theatre and homework and oh my god.
Human cloning. My public speaking thing is on human cloning and i'm supposed to have some opinion. Opinion? Dear god I don't know. I know what i'm told and I say what people want to hear. What the fuck opinion do I have? I do what gets the high marks and jump through all the hoops and play for the applause and what the hell do I even think about cloning? I should tell them I dont care. What is my opinion? I don't fucking care. So long as they don't clone me, I'm cool, whatever. God I'm fucking sick of schedules, I want summer, I want to just relax... I want to have fun and smile not have to run around for other people. I'm so sick of this bullshit.
I am currently Overwhelmed
| Member Comments on this Entry |
| Posted by Maureen Glaude on 04/02/04 at 12:57 PM wow. reading this helps me to not say the wrong thing to my daughter (who at almost 23 but back home and still in university, doesn't need me to anyway) when she is racing deadlines. Sometimes it's hard not to give those tips, meant well, but this shows how they can add pressure more than help, and what stresses someone your age is under. Sometimes parents think they're not trying, or not under the serious strain that others are, but I remember (and have diaries) of that sweat! Good luck, keep your spirits up and enjoy summer ahead. Yes, schedules! but they can keep our feet on the ground and keep us focused too. |
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| Posted by Barbara Griffith on 04/02/04 at 02:36 PM You know I'm always here if you need to rant, and I'm here if you need anything else. *hugs* |
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