What About Me??!!
12/31/2003 11:45 p.m.
If T suggests that I seek mental help or therapy one more time I am going to scream. He tells me that I have been going downhill since I graduated from school...that I have been really sad, miserable and depressed lately and it seems to be getting worse and worse. Now..maybe I haven't been myself (since I have also heard that from my family and friends), but I think the reason why is that I am getting completely annoyed with and tired of everything...my family, my job, and T. T decided he wants to go back to school for his doctorate. Now while I am proud of him for wanting to do this, it also pisses me off. Everything with him is about HIS goals and what HE wants to do...without even a thought to what I want. All of my friends who told me that they would never get married are beginning to get engaged and married every time I turn around while I (who always wanted to get married young) am sitting on my ass waiting around for someone who is not even going to think about marriage until he is finished with school again. (And taking only three credits a semester he won't be done until 2010 or 2011). Maybe I am being completely unreasonable... I mean T says that he is doing it for us to give us a better life...but my thing is that there is no guarantee that there will be an US after he finishes school... I guess the question is: Do I want to wait around and waste my years trying to find out? I honestly don't think that I can do that... but for now I am sticking it out.
I am currently Questioning
I am listening to My mom talking on the phone