Submission
10/25/2003 06:39 p.m.
That word makes me think about sex. Too bad this isn't about sex, would be more interesting.

I've only ever submitted my poetry anywhere twice, both times at Stirring, and they rejected me both times. So I'm rather hesitant to submit anywhere again, even though sometimes I think I should. Not to Stirring, because, obviously they don't like my poetry, but there's a whole world of e-zines out there, and I've never tried my luck with any of them.

I just don't like that gutpunch feeling that comes with rejection. And I know that I'll be rejected, so why set myself up for that type of thing?

I should totally stop being a crybaby and just go for it, but the fear that has a strangle hold on almost everyting I do won't let me forget that I'll probably be rejected and I'm just being a hopeful fucknut for every trying.

My mind does not reward optimism. It scoffs at and picks on it like a playground bully.