Birthday Nightmare
03/25/2003 01:53 a.m.

I've never had a more terrible birthday in my life than what I had yesterday. I got a couple phone calls, I got a couple instant messages and one person came by and wished me a happy birthday. The thought of people coming over and giving me a hug or making my day so much better never happened. I sat here all day and waited for that.

On top of it all, I get one of my closest friends telling me that I should have invited him over to celebrate my birthday. I was here. I was going to be here. I just feel so low. He gave me the third degree. He made me feel that it was all my fault. He took my birthday and shattered any good that was in it. The day just fell. I held in tears last night. It was so hard. I felt like running away last night. My life has not been the same for a while. I can't or I don't feel that I can live the same as I once did. I don't feel I'll ever be happy again. I never want to see such an awful day again. My 21st birthday and it's all over. All alone. Never to be forgotten. Never to get a second chance.

Depressed? Multiply that by as much as you can think...make a mood for that and there I am. :(