The Journal of A. Paige White Memorial to friendship 05/21/2009 04:23 p.m. I'm soooo looking forward to the weekend now. Glenda and Bill are going to New Orleans for the long weekend and now so are we!!!! I'm sure at some point we'll get together and hang out in the French Quarter with them. Every little thing, just little things I appreciate more. Amazing how we take for granted consciousness. Just consciousness. Heh. Until mine was suspended I took it for granted too. Every little thing, salt on your fries, spending time with great friends, loving on your kids and grandkids... all these things are priceless. Father, thank you for renewing my sense of gratitude for the smallest things, things so taken for granted even as we use and abuse our consciousness. Amen God's sense of humor is astounding. I mean astounding. When I was looking up trances, trying to find out just WHAT it was that happened to me, the first thing I run across was a common (but not to me, oh no, not to me)phrase about daydreaming, trancelike conditions and the phrase for it is, "meditating on the immortality of the crab" which I immediately found hilarious considering the three pictures that sit on my desk over my computer of the elaborate sand castle complete with the dead crab guarding it with his missing right claw and barnacle crown, and the legend some anonymous someone had written in front of it, Crab Manor, from my vacation last year. Jesus, you know you just crack me up. Your sense of humor is so divine. At least in how you deal with me personally anyway. I wish I could relay even a portion of it to others. People that don't know you just don't know what they're missing... You are awesome. Totally. You endeavor to create such elaborate personal lessons for me right in my life's daily circumstances, and you make some of them so doggone funny.... You just crack me up. I think it's what keeps me sane. Thank you. p.s. I love you I am currently Thunderstruck I am listening to HOS: Dynamic Stillness Comments (0) Spring is blooming 05/16/2009 02:49 a.m. Soaked in the day's dew... It's a Girl! This baby girl is making my baby girl bloom in full beauty. She is beautiful in her little pink maternity shirt. Radiant. Technology today is awesome. To see her daughter peeking from behind her blanket at four months...A W E S O M E It's a Girl! She's skybluepink In Jadi think... sKyBlUePiNk~;-> I am currently Silly Comments (3) Grand Mutha Frogggrrrs: Ribbit 05/09/2009 10:04 p.m. Click V here! I liked the new X-Men movie. Liked not loved. Mother's day came a day early for me... Daughter's have overtaken the world... I am currently Affectionate I am listening to Lake Woebegone Comments (2) Yeah, I know it's quite brutal, brutal eyes 04/24/2009 02:02 p.m. Not sure if I'm going to try to dr. on this and make a poem out of it or not... I'm still a bit too pissed off. You insisted on dressing me in a Holly suit So don’t be surprised it’s her winter That’s growing in my eyes The sticky part about dressing me in a Holly suit It’s growing to be and going to be the thorn in your side Where that rib bone used to be When I’m living in a Holly suit It’s easier to bury you, oops, berry you In a most fitting Ronnie disguise, and bake a sugar pie Your turn, try him on for size for a while Come on… don’t be shy Oh dear, I’m so sorry but this Holly suit really restricts My ability to love you while your wearing a Ronnie disguise Look on the bright side, it’s double the pleasure Of all the songs by John Prine! Forgive me dear, I can’t sing in this Holly suit and Ronnie in your eyes It’s frosty in a Holly suit As yet, no forecast for a thaw And these eyes are full of ice And darling, that’s no disguise For sure, an I love you note after 3 days of nothing Is a class A Ronnie thing to do Congratulations, you won the prize! You wear him very well. So here’s your “HI” from Holly, darlin’ And your welcome straight from hell. It’s a shame you couldn’t dress my love in a Holy suit instead. Cause the Holly collar smothered it, there’s no pulse I think it might be dead. I am currently Brooding I am listening to a phone that quit ringing Comments (1) 4/23/9 04/22/2009 04:19 p.m. Well well well... It's a pretty sad assessment of your state of mind, when your Mom calls to tell you she fell and broke her arm and you're freakin relieved to have something else to worry about for a while. Sad sad sad... I am in one more s t r a n g e mindset. It doesn't bode well cause I think I've got this deep anger thing going on, deep down, way down, somewhere, where trust used to be... and a carefree note after 2 days of nothing.... just don't cut it. just now found a moment... uh huh. sure I buy that. brutal, I feel brutal. I might find a moment to reply in a few days too... or maybe I won't. =========================================== 4-22-09 DA Boss is taking us to lunch for admin professionals day. And I did get beautiful red rose from someone that loves me. I was so shocked to find yesterday, that I'm experiencing an identical situation with Chip that I went through with him this time last year... and what's worse is that none of the biggies have changed. Nothing has changed even though things have changed. Still waiting for a call or an email... over nothing real. Still sure of nothing in my insecurities... everything's changed and yet nothing's changed. nothing's changed. slowly dawning on me... obliviously.... nothing's going to change. unless I make a change. That means taking charge of what I prioritize. Time to sit down in full view of the facts and make a new list of priorities. I'm obviously farther down on his list than I believed in my heart. His actions and words just don't allow me to ignore it anymore Nothing's changed. Still waiting and nothing's really changed except I'm only in his life 2/7ths of the time where it was a bit more before. but not much nothing's changed. and then from big D.... a rueful grinning unsought thought for the day... can't believe this... Thought: Want a change? Make a change! 2 Timothy 1:7 For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline. Recovery Prayer Blessed Father, I desperately want to change. But nothing changes if nothing changes. If I want a change I have to take the steps to make a change! Today and each day ahead I will make a change. I will make many changes. Lead me, strengthen me and grant me courage. Thank you for removing the spirit of fear and giving me the spirit of power and of love and of self-discipline! In the name of Jesus I pray. Amen. I am currently Depressed I am listening to what I didn't want to hear, my intuition screaming Comments (1) coolest co-worker 04/20/2009 06:07 p.m. just handed me a hershey's chocolate bar, "this is the best remedy when I'm upset with a guy and I just can't hardly stand to see you with no smiles..." gave me a big smile and I had to have a hug for her. I guess the misery is all over me. ah well. I have somewhat of a remedy I'll be trying this evening... looking forward to spending the evening's hours at the local library. Maybe I'll learn something. At least I'll get away from the place I rent during the week that is recently GETTING ON MY LAST NERVE. I am currently Better I am listening to BLAH BLAH BLAH Comments (0) An April garden's finizens feeding 04/19/2009 05:20 p.m. I am currently Thoughtfull I am listening to April showers Comments (0) Too, a leaf dancing, I toad you! 04/18/2009 05:14 p.m. Too, it's the weekend and the garden has washed the week away.... Soft Saturday lullabyes hush my weary soul Left too, is the sigh that satisfies. Purple ponders turn from dark angel dahlias, darling when splashes abound clouded glories resound I am currently Refreshed I am listening to Sweet spring sounds and tweets Comments (0) bleh April 15 04/15/2009 02:22 p.m. Had a strange dream this morning about babies and swarms of bats. Crazy as it sounds they weren't at all harmful to them...The weirdest thing is how they swarmed... and they had spiky hair(?) on their heads.. rather small, can still see the few I got close to... And a nine (or eleven) hour trip to somewhere in Texas. heheheeeee.... Woke up with all my grumpy gone though. Completely gone. And I have been some kinda grumpy the last few days... ok. Since it brought a gift I truly feel obligated to speak faith into THAT atmosphere about it. These swarms will in no way harm the babies. In no way. Nor will your swarms smother their breath or steal their vision. You who excel in strength, go. See to it that it is so. You sure know how to rile me up Lord. Nobody or nothing's going to hurt any babies or smother them or the vision you gave them on my watch, if I have any sayso about it. Harrrumph. Swarm all you want, but you will n o t t o u c h t h e b a b i e s. I am currently Cheerful I am listening to Space Guitars 8 Comments (0) Such a cutie! 04/10/2009 02:07 p.m. The Glendini and her prom bound boy... He just looked so cute in that suit! I am currently Cheerful I am listening to the Friday countdown... T-Ball tonight! Comments (1) Next 10 Entries - Previous 10 Entries Return to the Library of A. 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