The Journal of Arthur Parten|
12/12/2006 04:51 a.m.
I ought to be writing about mental illness and responsibility right now, but I'm not. Writing, that is. Or responsible, come to think of it. Mentally ill? That one I make no claims about.
I think I need to drive down the east coast in a few days so I can spend a day on the beach. I'll spend a day on Georgia's playground of dead millionaires, and maybe it'll rejuvenate me a bit. I'm going to make a pilgrimage to Macon after that. I've always wanted to see Rose Hill Cemetery. There must be something to a place with the graves of two gods and a few legends in it.
Twenty-second verse, same as the first
01/11/2006 10:00 a.m.
Would to god that I could rip my intuition from my senses and cast it upon the water, but one of my greatest fears is that it would return to me sevenfold, and I don't think I could handle that.
One's dream is another's nightmare, and I really ought to avoid sleep for fear of being visited by others' dreams.
Somebody enlighten me as to the difference between fasting and starving again.
Would to god that I could rip from my mind that painfully analytical section that solves word problems while I'm screaming "No, for the love of all that is good and holy, stop!" and then has the nerve to look up as though it has done something worth doing. Would to god that I'd rather be a fool than know some things. Would to god so many things.
Now to toss through the showing of others' dreams, wants.
Too sick to leave,
11/01/2005 06:17 p.m.
too bored to study.
So there are three main choices, mono, strep, or a persistent case of the flu. The doc thinks mono though I've got no swelling. How often do you *hope* you have the flu? This semester needs to be over now. I'm drifting through it, and it was alright at first, but it's led me to be melancholy lately. I don't do well with melancholy. My GPA will suffer this term pretty heavily, but I'll live through it. I always manage to.
I'm going to do more stream of consciousness type prose. I've missed it.
I'm also going to shamelessly steal this from Alaina Schneider.
1. ONE WISH?
Happiness for those close to me
2. ARE YOU A LOVER OR A FIGHTER?
A more experienced fighter but a better lover
3. WHAT'S YOUR WORST FEAR?
Allowing small concerns to weigh on me and warp me into something I'd rather die than become.
And being overly dramatic.
4. AS A KID, WERE YOU A LEGO MANIAC?
Who wasn't? I was a huge fan of the shiny futuristic legos you could make convincing spaceships out of.
5. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF "REALITY" TV?
Bread and circuses.
6. DO YOU CHEW ON YOUR STRAWS?
In all circumstances except really nice restaurants.
7. WERE YOU A CUTE BABY?
I had a head shaped like a banana.
8. IS THE SINGLE LIFE FOR YOU?
In no shape, form, or fashion.
9. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR KEYBOARD?
10. DO YOU SING IN THE SHOWER?
Yes, one song in particular.
11. HAVE YOU EVER BUNGEE JUMPED?
No, and I have no intention of doing so. I wouldn't mind skydiving though.
12. ANY SECRET TALENTS?
If I wrote them down, they wouldn't be secret talents, no?
13. WHAT'S YOUR IDEAL VACATION SPOT?
For hours? A beautiful little area with cliffs and a waterfall an hour from my home.
For days? Less tourist-laden areas of coastal Georgia
For company? California
14. IS JAY LENO FUNNY?
He isn't fit to speak Johnny Carson's name.
15. CAN YOU DRIVE?
16. HAVE YOU SEEN THE MOVIE "DONNIE DARKO"?
Nope. It's on a list of things I have to do though
18. HOW MANY LICKS DOES IT TAKE TO GET TO THE CENTER OF A TOOSTIE POP?
One really long, complex lick.
19. CAN YOU SING THE ALPHABET BACKWARDS?
20. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON AN AIRPLANE?
I'm still like a kid on any flight. It's kind of unusual for 6'2" guys to choose window over aisle, but I love looking out.
21. ARE YOU AN ONLY CHILD?
22. DO YOU PREFER ELECTRIC OR MANUAL PENCIL SHARPENERS?
23. WHAT'S YOUR STAND ON HUNTING?
You kill it, you'd better eat it (armadillos and prairie dogs excepted). Trophy hunting is pointless, wasteful, and stupid.
24. IS MARRIAGE IN YOUR FUTURE?
Magic 8 ball says "Reply hazy; try in a few years."
25. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
Can I read it? No
26. WHAT ARE YOU ALLERGIC TO?
Nothing, thank God.
27. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SAID, "I LOVE YOU?"
Said - about 3 days ago
Thought - about 3 minutes ago
28. IS ELVIS STILL ALIVE?
No, unfortunately; I know because he bequeathed his lip snarl to me.
30. HOW DO YOU LIKE YOUR EGGS?
With lots of hot sauce, style is secondary.
31. ARE BLONDES DUMB?
Yes. Everyone's an idiot at least occasionally. They're no worse than any other group I suppose.
32. WHERE DOES THE OTHER SOCK END UP?
Behind the dryer
33. WHAT TIME IS IT?
34. DO YOU HAVE A NICKNAME?
Not any lasting ones. Mostly plays on my name.
35. IS MCDONALD'S DISGUSTING?
At times. But then again, everything except chicken and fruit can put me off once in a while.
36. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WERE IN A CAR?
Damn, I think it's been a month if we're not counting charter buses for away games.
37. DO YOU PREFER BATHS OR SHOWERS?
38. IS SANTA CLAUS REAL?
Sure, though I've had to help out by cleverly disguising myself as him a couple of times.
39. DO YOU LIKE TO HAVE YOUR NECK KISSED?
It's been a long while, but yes.
40. ARE YOU AFRAID OF THE DARK?
Not in the slightest. I love it. The night sky is much better.
41.WHAT ARE YOU ADDICTED TO?
Lots of music and one spoken voice
42. CRUNCHY OR CREAMY PEANUT BUTTER?
Creamy for most purposes, crunchy for crackers
43. CAN YOU CRACK YOUR NECK?\
44. HAVE YOU EVER RIDDEN IN AN AMBULANCE?
Once, for about two blocks. It would have made more sense to let me walk to the hospital.
45. HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU BRUSHED YOUR TEETH TODAY?
Just once, but I haven't eaten so nothing wrong there
46. IS DRUG FREE THE WAY TO BE?
Only for puritans and ascetics.
47. ARE YOU A HEAVY SLEEPER?
Most of the time
48. WHAT COLOR ARE YOUR EYES?
Blue most of the time
50. DO YOU LIKE YOUR LIFE?
Most of the time, not too much right now.
51. LIQUOR OR BEER?
52. ARE YOU PSYCHIC?
53. HAVE YOU READ "CATCHER IN THE RYE"?
54. DO YOU PLAY ANY INSTRUMENTS?
No; I keep putting off learning the guitar.
55. HAVE U EVER STOLEN MONEY?
56. CAN YOU SNOWBOARD?
57. DO YOU LIKE CAMPING?
I love it.
58. DO U SNORT WHEN U LAUGH?
Only very rarely, and only at really inopportune times.
59. DO YOU BELIEVE IN MAGIC?
In a young girl's heart, how the music can sway her whenever it starts?
60. ARE DOGS A MAN'S BEST FRIEND?
Of animals, yes.
61. DO YOU BELIEVE IN DIVORCE?
The short anser is no, though the long answewr would include a few yeses
62. CAN YOU DO THE MOONWALK?
Not even close
63. DO YOU MAKE A LOT OF MISTAKES?
Sure, everyone does.
64. IS IT HOT OUTSIDE TODAY?
Inuit would freeze to death in PA in November
65. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?
66. DO YOU WEAR NAIL POLISH?
I haven't yet, though I have had one tempting offer.
67. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN KISSED?
68. WHAT'S THE MOST ANNOYING COMMERCIAL?
Anything Old Navy has done.
69. DO YOU SHOP AT AMERICAN EAGLE?
70. DO YOU SNORE?
71. FAVORITE SONG AT THE MOMENT?
Whatcha Gonna Do - Cowboy Mouth
72. LAST THING THAT MADE YOU SAD?
October, the whole godforsaken month.
73. WHAT IS BEST IN LIFE?
To crush your enemies, to see them driven before you...wait, that's Conan the Barbarian
To spend good times with those you care about.
I am listening to Closer to You - The Wallflowers
Words are not strong enough
10/06/2005 06:00 a.m.
and are thus lies. You said this a long time ago, and the sublime truth of it echoes today and past tomorrow.
I think they can at least point in the right direction though, and I hope that through this they can let us find pure and beautiful truth through their guidance of our own thoughts. Here now are a few pretty lies, and here's hoping they're prettier ones than the first few I told you. I did own up to the fact that the first ones belonged on a Hallmark card, at least. I'm putting this here so you can see it now; timing is important, after all. There's no good place to put these types of things on here.
Thank you for showing me that I can appreciate the wonder in things without worrying whether or not they will stay or evaporate through time. It may come off from time to time as a stupidly stubborn overconfidence in the future, but all I see is a knowledge of what is right and beautiful in front of me. Sometimes this consumes my thoughts to the point I don't worry about long term issues or things that perhaps should or do place barriers in our path, but I hope my ceaseless overconfidence can be excused a bit because of this.
Thank you for telling me I should write. I'm still far from good about writing my thoughts, but at least the fact that I have an acount here says I'm better about it than my previous months of drought would otherwise say.
Thank you for a few beautiful days in August. Thank you for showing me so many great and memorable things that my thoughts go back to those days every time my eyes close more constantly then if I'd had a mural of those days inscribed on my eyes themselves.
Thank you for a year, dear heart.
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