It really makes me wonder
03/30/2007 07:06 a.m.
Whenever I look up my poetry index by the most recently read poems, I find myself wondering about whoever has been reading them. I notice when someone gets into a folder and starts reading through it. Then, they stop, and I think, oh, that last one they read must not have been very good, or maybe the dinner bell rang and they had to go. I just wonder about these things. There's no real point here, but do you ever think about what others are really thinking when they read your poems? Because I get the feeling, when I read the comments I get, or those in other people's libraries, that the comments very often fall short of what is really going through the minds of the readers. Not all of them, but many. Maybe I wonder this because I see that sometimes, someone reads through an entire folder of poems, yet leaves no comments. And I think, well, if they read them all, something must have kept them reading till the end, right? So if they didn't feel compelled to comment, yet liked them enough to read them all, what were they thinking? It's the secret thoughts that I want to read the most. I also wonder what stopped a reader in the middle of a folder. I sometimes go back and read the poem to see if there is something offensive in the last one read, maybe it just sucks, or maybe it was too personal. I wonder about many of my older poems in that light. Back before I went public with my poetry, I wrote differently. I wasn't afraid to open my heart so completely because I knew it was only going to be read by one person other than me, and I was usually trying to win over her heart. So I wonder if they might hit a little too close to home. On the other hand, maybe they just suck....

I am currently Reflective
I am listening to Molly sleeping on my bed

The oddities never cease!
03/21/2007 10:03 a.m.
My birthday is the 25th, I'll be turning 44. 4 is an odd number for me, no pun intended. I had this dream way back when I was a tennager that something important was going to happen on my 44th birthday, but I woke up before whatever it was happened. Who knows, maybe the big quake will hit out here... 4 has always been my favorite number, so I'm hoping it's something good.
It just so happens that my READS counter just passed 10,444. This is interesting to me, though it will mean nothing to anyone else. When I was a kid, Rusty Staub was my favorite baseball player. He has the distinction of being born on April Fools Day, aside from his baseball and cooking careers. Well, when he was traded to the Mets, he wore the number 4 on his uniform for the first year he was with them. He has always worn number 10 before that, but someone else had it already, so he switched to 4. Then, the next season, he was back to wearing 10. So it's funny to me that my counter had 10,444 just a few days before my 44th birthday.
So I wonder what will happen on my birthday this year. I hope it doesn't alter my plans to move back to NY on April 3rd. I have my flight schedualed for that day. Interestingly, I will be taking off at the same time I land from AM to PM, but 3 hours shorter due to the East Coast, West Coast time zone shift.
JJ
I am currently Odd
I am listening to Lunch Box Odd Sox by Paul McCartney

Additional thoughts on comments
03/09/2007 05:53 a.m.
In a reply to an instant message about my previous journal entry:

Mainly, what I was referring to is a website called Authorsden.com where there are writers of all kinds(poetry, short stories, articles and more). It's a very well put together site, but so far, what I have been reading there doesn't come close to the quality of poetry that I have read here on Pathetic. And what's interesting to me, as everyone there has published a book, is that there are a lot of people paying to fool themselves into believing they are very good writers. It's not that they don't write passionately, they certainly do, but the grammer and forced rhymes are just plain terrible. Granted I have only read through a handful of poets work there, so I am sure I am gong to find some very high quality work eventually, it's just a challenge so far. On Pathetic, I routinely find outstanding poems. Not by everyone, but most everyone I have read here has at least a few exceptional pieces. Some has several and a few blow me away every time I read something they write. So I am just a little dismayed after reading the poems of those who have commented on my own poems. I will have to venture out. Maybe it's just that those who comment there are starving for attention and the ones who write really great poetry don't spend as much time trying to get others to stroke their ego.


I am currently Amazed
I am listening to nothingness

Commenting on really bad poetry
03/08/2007 09:06 a.m.
Well, I joined this other website for authors and was expecting a lot of really good poetry, due to the fact that everyone on the site has a book published. So I posted a few of my poems to see what sort of comments I would get and I got several very nice ones. So I decided to go to the libraries of those who commented and write some nice reviews. But I am an honest person and if I don't like a poem, I generally won't leave a public comment. I might write a private message if I want to offer some constructive feedback, without being too harsh, but when a poem is really, really bad, I am torn between letting the person know and not saying anything at all. I bring this up because I was reading through poem after poem by these published authors and could not believe my eyes.

Now keep in mind that I am a rhymer. Everyone who has read my poetry knows that I rhyme nearly everything I write. I think I'm pretty good at it, though hardly a great poet. Still, after 25 years of writing poetry, I think I have got the hang of it. And I also think I can recognize a good poem when I read one, rhyming or not. So I am browsing through the libraries of these poets, and I just couldn't believe how awful they were. I was hoping it was just the luck of the draw and that they would start getting better as I plowed through the fields. And what really got me angry was that these are exactly the kind of poets that give rhyming poetry a bad name. Because they all sounded like sing-songy nursery rhymes, but were not written for children. it would be one thing if they were writing children's poetry, ya know, I rather enjoy reading "Green Eggs And Ham" at open mics. But this stuff was horrible trash that was written very seriously for other adults. And what I really found unbelievable were the comments other poets were leaving for them.

The comments were very general, occasionally mentioning a line from the poem, but usually the old, "really great poem", types that made me think the reviewers hadn't even read the poem. And I am thinking to myself, someone has got to tell this person the truth. But then I thought, if I do that, I will be the only one of dozens who didn't like it, so they will either think I am a dumb-ass, or I have something against them personally. Who knows, but it just seems so crazy. Now I don't comment here nearly as often as I should, and not nearly as much as I did in my previous incarnation here. Mostly that's because I have been a lot more busy over the past few years and don't have time to read a lot. But I am hoping to get back into the swing of things after I move back to NY and get settled in next month.

Anyway, the point is, I don't know if I should say anything, or just let it go and live in the fantasy zone. I mean, I am not exactly Walt Whitman, so who am I to burst their bubble....

JJ
I am currently Clueless
I am listening to Silence

I hate to admit defeat, but....
02/26/2007 07:56 a.m.
After 8 months in California, I am in dire straights and must move back to NY by the end of March or I will be homeless. If anyone can help me with moving expenses, please go to
my website @ www.seeds-and-weeds.com
and donate whatever you can via Paypal through the Visa/Mastercard Donation button near the middle of the page, between the chapter index for Seeds And Weeds and the first A-Store..
The button that says "We Prefer Paypal" is not the donation button, that is a Paypal ad they require. Please use the button that says DONATE on it.

This is a serious plea for help, I must move and do not have money to get back. If I don't go, I won't have enough money to pay April's rent and will be evicted. At least if I can go back to NY, I will have a room to stay at with family for a few weeks, but then I need to be in my own apartment. I will be transferring from my job in CA to the same company in NY, which is the one bright spot in all of this, but I'm only making $9.50/hr and won't have enough money for a deposit and first months rent. Even if it's just a few bucks, it will be more than I have now. Hopefully enough few bucks will come in and I will be able to make it home. Hey, if it makes a difference, my birthday is March 25th....

Thanks for your help,
JJ

I am currently Exhausted
I am listening to HELP! by the Beatles

Seeds and Weeds 4-sale
09/19/2006 11:42 a.m.
This is a book that challenges the mind and heart to find a better way. Seeds And Weeds is about the rise and fall of character expressed in poetry and prose.

It is available on Amazon.com or www.seeds-and-weeds.com where you can read excerpts and find interesting links. ISBN number 1-4196-3309-0

Do you know of someone who has allowed pride to grow too far and strangle a nation? Will it grow until it strangles this nation and others he deems unworthy? Are we also witnessing the strangulation of Mother Nature at his hands?

It's time to weed the garden!

JJ Johnson

I am currently Troubled
I am listening to The Drum Major Instinct by Rev. Martin Luther King Jr.

Living in California at last
07/06/2006 10:25 p.m.
It's taken me years of wishing and planning, but I am finally here. Now all I have to do is figure out what to do now that I am...
JJ
I am currently Happy
I am listening to California Dreamin' by the Mamas and the Papas

An Inconvenient Truth
06/18/2006 10:19 p.m.
I went to see "An Inconvenient Truth" last night. It opened across the country and I hope everyone who thinks Global Warming isn't a serious and very real problem for us, will go to see it.
I remember when I was a kid, when they warned us about environmental problems and the damage we were doing to the Earth. That was in the early 70's and the non-believers would say, "oh that won't happen for a thousand years". And to think it only took 30. The worst part is, we have a President who doesn't care about anything but money and oil. So remember that we could have Al Gore instead of the lying idiot we have for a President, who is killing our soldiers, killing our world and if that doesn't mean anything to you, he's killing YOU!
See this movie, be educated and do something!
And now for a poem I wrote, way back on 03/03/1990.

"He Who Laughs Last Will Be A Fertile, Mutant Cockroach"

When I look up in the air
I can see the wind blowing
I can see the trees dying
From the tears the sky is crying
It'll take much more than care
To ease Mother Nature's pain
To wash acid out of rain
Oil is a quiet hurricane

Show them all the evidence
But they won't believe their eyes
Even now they still deny
Water is not all that clouds the sky

When a doughnuts hole is gone
There is nothing left to eat
When ozones hole is complete
There won't be anything but heat
That's no way to heat our home
We need an alternative
And more initiative
The bottom line is that we live

If we murder Mother Earth
Count now what your money won't be worth
No one will laugh, no one will wear the final smile
There will be no one to put on trial

JJ Johnson

This poem is included in my book "Seeds And Weeds" which can be previed on my website www.seeds-and-weeds.com where you will find a link to purchase the book from Amazon.com and other sources.
I am currently Troubled
I am listening to Salt Water by Julian Lennon

Inside and Out
06/04/2006 05:15 a.m.
It's getting beyond frustrating! After all the problems with the cover, which are not completely fixed, now the inside has a problem. And what's really weird is that I can't even understand how this one happened.

First, let me explain something about the inside of the book. From cover to cover, everything inside this book was done by me. I admit to making a few typos and spelling errors, but one thing I am sure of, there were no blank pages in my manuscript. What's more, the PDF I created and sent to the publisher is the file they use to create the book, so it is impossible for pages to simply disappear, especially when the first set of books were fine. So, I cannot understand how the Author page just up an disappeared. It is the third from the last page in the book. The last page was to be blank, but they add a bar code and number which represents the lot number for the book, so in essence, each book has a sort of serial number. So, with that bar code and number, there should not be one page without either typing or a picture on it.

So how is it possible that a page that had printing on it in the original sets made, suddenly is blank. And why is it the Author page. Now, my book has no information about me in it. How did this happen? The only way it could have happened, in my opinion, is for someone to have deliberately deleted the information from the PDF file. A PDF file is something like a photograph. If you have ever read PDF files, you know they act differently than other files with text. The same is true of PDF web pages. Now, if the data were corrupted, the odds of it affecting only one page are slim to none. If the page were deleted, not just the text on it, then there would be no blank page and the book would be one page shorter. The page following it would simply have moved up a page if that had occurred, so something is amiss. I am wondering if Booksurge Publishing is tired of my calls about errors in their manufacturing of the book and now wants me to find another publisher.

Perhaps they are angry with me for finding all their mistakes, who knows? But now I am seriously considering terminating our contract based on their incompetence. This will possibly cause me to miss out on an entire Summer of sales, as it will take up to two months to get the book published by someone else. So I may just order a bunch, even though they are not right, and after I get them, terminate and find another publisher. That way I will have some copies to get me through poetry readings and still be able to sell enough to make back my investment.

Booksurge is the book publisher for Amazon.com. You would think a company of that size would have better quality control, but it amazes me how little care they take, not only in the creation of their books, but also in the shipping of them. Consider that nearly every shipment I have received, except one, has been poorly packed for shipment. Often the books are loose inside the packaging and wind up with dented corners from sliding around in the box. Some have had bend covers, which I can only imagine id from whoever packed them not being careful. The one box of books that was perfectly packed was done so only after I complained about the previous problems. But since all of those books had the blank Author page, even that was a major disappointment.

I went in thinking that because I chose Booksurge, I would be getting a higher standard of quality, as these are the people who know publishing and selling books from every aspect. Now I am wondering why I ever thought that.

JJ

I am currently Frustrated
I am listening to Excuses from my publisher

I just sent this to my publisher, Booksurge
05/23/2006 01:51 a.m.
Well, where do I begin? I could not be any more disappointed in the book order I received today. Never mind the fact that UPS will not deliver at a time when I can be at home and I have to take the extra time and expense of going to the UPS office 10 miles from my home, but then I find I only received 9 of the 10 books I ordered. I was concerned at first that the 10th book had fallen out of the package it was delivered in, since it was not completely sealed. Not that it had become damaged or opened during delivery, but because the box was not the right size and had openings on two sides. So I checked the packing slip and sure enough, only 9 were shipped and another would be shipped at some future time. Nothing was mentioned as to when, but at least I was relieved, for a moment, that I wasn't going to be able to get a replacement. Of course, now I will have to go back to their office again, to pick up one book, and incur more expense and the wasting of my time to get it.

So that was the beginning of my bad experience. Upon opening the package, I was astounded at how poorly packed the package was. There was extra space in the box, which by the way could have been filled with another book, but the extra space caused the books to move around in the box during shipping and ding the corners. I have no idea why this type of box was used, since it clearly was not meant to ship books of this size in any amount. But now I have 9 books that look like crap. Had the tenth book been in the box, it would likely have prevented the movement of the others and no dings would have occurred.

But let me further explain my disappointment. Whatever machine was used to make these 9 books was not the same machine that made my author copy or the copy that my friend and colleague, Noura Badawi, received two weeks ago from Amazon. I know this because the quality of these books is substandard compared to the others. I might have thought it was just because the author copy was given some special manufacturing treatment that general customers did not get, except that I was able to see the one my friend had ordered and it was exactly the same as my author copy. So what else can go wrong?

First of all, the fold crease near the binding is absent from these copies. I might not have minded this because, as you may recall, I was not happy with the way the crease line went down through the photo on the back. But it appears that the crease fold line saves the cover from other problems, notably the binding looks terrible and the cover has other lines in it that are much less attractive that the intentional crease fold line on my copy and my friends copy.

Continuing on with cover problems, on all 9 copies, there are small dents all over the back cover. And these dents are identical on each book, so it is clearly a problem with the manufacturing process. There is a definite pattern to the dents and it is exactly the same on each book. The dents do not appear on the front cover, so it looks like something that happened after the cover was applied to the book but before it was packed. Another problem, one I mentioned about my original author copy, is that the very bottom of my author photo on the back cover has a slight shift and duplication of the beltline. It causes a very small duplication of about 1/20 of an inch at the bottom of the picture and then shifts it slightly to the left. If not for the fact that it is a picture of me, I might not care, but it makes me look weird.

I really don't know what I want to do at this point. I am greatly aggravated at all of this. I have these books that my friends and family have been waiting for and I do not want them to have to wait any longer. But I also am embarrassed at the quality of them and can hardly see asking them for money for a sub-standard copy. On the other hand, I am not interested in paying more money to go to the UPS office and ship them back. The shipping and gas costs alone mean I will lose money, since it will exceed what I saved on the books in the first place.

I am also not sure I want anyone else ordering these books and having to pay over $20 to get them. The price is another issue. On your website, it said the price would be $14.95, which I placed on the back cover. It has apparently gone up to $14.99. 4 cents is no big deal, but I have had several people mention it to me already, after showing them my copy and then noticing it says 14.99 on my website. Most people will never notice this, I hope, but my friends have.

This process has been a lot of work for me over the past few months. I have put an enormous amount of time into putting it all together and at this time I do not feel like my efforts were worth the end result. My name is on this book. My picture is on this book. It looks like crap, and so do I.

JJ Johnson

I am currently Angry
I am listening to nothing, to angry to listen right now

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