Loving Languages
09/29/2005 01:09 p.m.
The photo problem solved, (thanks, you know who you are) I now have changed my library one for the next while at least. I think my pensive look on my face in the kado shot may be due to a moment where we'd all just learned how Marianne Bluger, our co-leader of kado ottawa, has continued to be so much more worse from her cancer lately. She's surpassed (over many years) all the medical predictions, and gone on to continue living a full life and publishing and creating way past expectations, (medically) but now is suffering final stages.
I'm not sure if that's what the serious look on my face is all about but suspect so. I'm hugely devoted to her example and spirit. She also lives very close to me, and attended the same high school as my eldest brother, but I've only come to know her through haiku and from Sasquatch originally also.

We were invited to send haiku in support, that would be taken to Marianne's home recently by her dear friend and co-leader, Terry Ann Carter. I gave this one I wrote right away, inspired from an image at our campsite and I felt it suits Marianne and her experiences, and mine of her.


for Marianne Bluger

the first leaf
to catch the breeze
starts the flutter

I guess I'll be adding more photos as time permits, in journals, as I enjoy Image so much and yet now am busy with studying and homework for Italian class on top of poetry classes. But these inspire me and motivate me, all these learning endeavours with language, so much. And the people I've met and continue to are always a treasure tucked in with the word gifts.

The sounds of the Italian coming from my teacher, Filomena, soon drifted to me easily and comfortably and so musically, like Spanish does, and I felt right at home. Though I admit I was shy (yes, even me, I do get shy and quiet and self-conscious especially trying to get my tongue around a new language in the first times I'm called up to speak to the class or teacher)only minutes into being taught a few words, and using our little fun sentences, to introduce ourselves to the group. What was amusing was that our example sheet to use for responses did not provide how to say "I'm married" in Italian, ( we later learned it's esposata(o)when we were asked that, and so all we married ones were saying "Sono scapolo" - (for the men responding), and Sono nubile - (for the women), which meant we were all single. Every one of us. That was the wording on the page, don't blame me! He he. We were diligently doing our work, is all, with what we had at hand at the time! One man had his wife there, sitting right beside him, when he answered he was single! We all laughed often, already as we are getting to know one another and the language, another gift of such learning situations. It works much better in a group of conversational beginners when there's laughter to relax us. Not laughing at each other, but with each other. But I can tell this is going to be a particularly tight and friendly group and the teacher is the kind to build social rapport, not like the one I had for Spanish a few years ago who didn't foster that. I found it unusual, as most of my language teachers always have. It makes the flow work so much better and the hours pass more happily and easily.

The teacher's terrific, I can tell already I'm going to like her process and personality, and sounds so familiar because she's from the same part of Italy my neighbour across the street is from - Calabria, not to mention others I know whose heritage is partly from there.

Last night I wondered if my Spanish, French or English would suffer, that silly little fear we get when we take on a new language. I guess in a way it did, as I e-mailed "knew" for "new" when I was tired and still fresh from immersion of two hours with Italian.

Sorry Chris. But then again, typos do happen whether we play with language or not. Right? Well off to do my review and watch for my Italian and English word of the day on the e-mails. Maybe the verb to know in English will come to me this morning!
The shot below is of myself and Brewster my sister's darling cat, who slept with me often when I stayed there to help last year when Jack was dying, and that picture was taken during one of those stays at their place in the country. I love that Marilyn (the photographer) caught the slip of moon behind the bay window. My scanner seems to make streaks on images when I scan, and if anyone knows why please tell me, it's so annoying. And getting worse. If I win a lottery, one of the things on my list is a new scanner!

I am currently Good

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With kado ottawa Aug 05
09/28/2005 04:50 p.m.

Photo Credit: Grant Savage, Ottawa, Ontario Aug '05

For my library here, I have reduced this Aug. 27 05 shot of me taken at a lovely meeting in Carleton Place, Ottawa, of our Ottawa area kado society, As well as a fine photographer (nature images being one of his specialities), renowned haikuist, tanka and free verse poet, Grant Savage is a highly-respected friend of mine and fellow member of kado and Haiku and Tanka Canada organizations). He kindly passed on the photo via another member, Claudia. So far I haven't been able to make it the acceptable limit for my library. It's more up to date than the one I'd had up 'til today, on there. Of course I could cheat and keep pretending I look like I did five or six years ago, in that shot I was fortunate to be given, taken by Don Loper, another dear friend, but I figure it's time to move on. I'll keep it at hand and using it for other purposes, and always like to have it as a moment of a very happy and exciting period of my life, and one of great growth and learning at Sasquatch.

I feel (I fear) a cold coming on, not a good thing since I'm so looking forward to Italian Conversation's first class tonight. So I've taking extra vitamins and cod liver oil, and am going to take a nap now. PS I hope to finish soon writing a poem about that lovely afternoon with kado, under the very windblowing butternut tree. Is windblowing a word? I don't want windblown, as the action was very much prevalent as we sat there, some of us peeking around the branches and leaves to see each other, and shouting our haiku in our outdoor circle, as the wind was so loud. Not the usual gentle feel of haiku sharing, the quietness, but very fun and memorable.


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A Backward Glance to '74
09/16/2005 04:49 p.m.

Going through old photos sure is fun and interesting, not to mention tough and nostalgic sometimes. This treasure on my lap is my nephew Tim, on whose lap now I could more likely sit. He's a strapping big wonderful guy, in his thirities now, my eldest brother Dave's son, and my second nephew to be born. This was in Fall 1974 at his home in Aylmer, Quebec. Since he's coming up to his birthday again, I just sent him this one as well as some more from that series the same day, but this is my favourite one of us together when he was little. I don't see him often enough, but he served as usher for my son and his bride in May, and looked terrific there too!

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Tech Support
09/16/2005 01:41 p.m.
Today and last night I've been pulling some poems from my library here, temporarily for the most part, so if any are missing that you'd kindly saved as your favourites or anything, that's why. Special thanks to Mike McConnell for his practically immediate help on the Site Support forum last night, as I was searching through all my poems for certain ones, in haste, and it's a slow job if you don't use the search engine on pathetic.org, fortunately we have it, and need to look for a poem in a large library with several folders. A tips to newcomers or oldcomers like me who don't know - it's really worthwhile asking even what you feel are dumb questions, on the Site Support, and of friends who might know, and can save you a lot of headaches, eye aches and time. I'm learning more since re-starting my crashed computer and having to work from a fortunately successful back-up, but things are very much slower right now. Thank heavens for friends, like Chris Sorrenti, and my daughter, for helping a lot too. It takes a lot of patience when these things happen, especially to a not-too-techie but getting moreso, person.
When everything flows properly on my system, (including the printer of course, a big-time groan when it's tempermental) I really enjoy computer life, but the glitches and scares can be frustrating. Even discs and CDs lose things, it seems. And I am working on being even more organized! To me, there's still nothing like the hard copy! Unless a flood or fire hits that too.

This month is crucially busy for getting the word out, in contests, publications, class work, so I'm relieved to be up and running more or less, plus will be off-line in early Oct. for two weeks at least, (someday a lap top when I have the cash will help for such trips). I'll be out in what I hear is now quite a coyote territory, at my sister's in the country, but my daughter will check my e-mails (but not read them unless I say to, when I hear who they're from and she I share an impeccable trust on these things),Maybe she'll peek in here, too, for me, and update me throughout that period )but being a very intense busy student at university, in a crucial year of her program, she won't have much time to spare. Anyhow, that's not til early Oct. so I'm working hard to get ahead and hopefully after that, will pursue some new projects too I've promised myself. Thanks helper-friends, and on with the show!


I am currently Creative
I am listening to Majic l00

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A Shot from the Campsite
09/10/2005 07:44 p.m.

Interruptions & Peaceful breaks
08/28/2005 01:15 p.m.
Due to computer woes (can't get into my Windows, and am borrowing my daughter's right now) I may be very quiet over the next while, so excuse me if I don't respond to messages or comments. As often as I can, without being a pain to my daughter, (who's very generous with sharing but will soon be busy for university with her office more her sanctuary then than ever,) I'll come onto the site to check.

Meanwhile, I hope to keep getting comments etc. and read, hint hint. I sure hope my problem will be rectified soon. September's a busy month for writers, for everyone, and there are contests, classes, etc. starting up too. Not to even get onto my word processing is a real pain. I have to be two weeks offline anyway in early Sept. around the 11th, but was hoping to get ahead of the game on some of my writing business in the period up til then. Oh well, > at least yesterday I had a lovely afternoon "Under the Butternut Tree" at a meeting in the little town of Carleton Place, in the rural area about an hour out of town, with kado ottawa, the haiku group for Ottawa.

When Terry Ann Carter, our leader, hung up our kado banner (we display for every meeting/function) with its Japanese title, all beautiful hand-done in red print by her, on the Butternut tree branch, in the wind, I couldn't resist as she was describing the importance of the meeting, representing our local group, and said "Ottawa Branch" and everyone laughed and said good one, Maureen. We had lots of laughs, a welcome relaxed diversion for me yesterday. My haiku for this summer went over very well, and I received a suggestion on my canoe one from The Tadpole Contest recently held on here (the haiku is posted in My Latest), plus some discussion of the winning one on that contest. I hope to write the afternoon experience all up in a poem, hope Hardy won't mind, called "Under the Butternut Tree." We even had a darling little lhaso apso, our white mascot, running about the lawn, but quiet and well-behaved as we read our haiku aloud, and the whole time, in fact, one of the member's pets, and a parrot indoors who screeched welcome every time we entered the house.

We covered important business, updates, China trips for teaching, that some had been on, (both our leader and the host actually), Haiku News and Tanka News worldwide and local, or national, and also ate tons, laughed, grieved a bit for the illness of one of our leaders, and sat beneath the low-hanging butternut tree whose branches sometimes interfered with our views of each other and tickled our faces, but the breeze was so lovely in the heat, and the garden and house like a Tuscan setting. Complete with statues, gates of iron, stonework, arbours and trellises, and flowers. Our pot-luck spread was set up with beautiful serviettes, and blue plastic knives and forks and spoons, in the white gazebo on the deck. Gorgeous. Hope my photos worked. Later there was a little wine, which we've never benefited from at a meeting together before, as well as ice tea. Hostess Claudia out-did herself.

I'm really enjoying reading The Smoke Jumper by Nicholas Evans (of The Horse Whisperer fame) and find his writing incredible. Rivers are integral to his stories, (as well as wildlife & landscape & forbidden romances) and many of his lines thread this reader mesmerizingly along their route like the flow of a river. Plus he seems to understand and know the motivations, temptations, diverse angles, of human nature and deal with them flawlessly. He's one author I'd love to hear one day in person, and learn more about. His writing challenges me, with his vocabulary at times, and his wisdom, and I love that. I love Nicholas Sparks' work too, but for different reasons and it offers me a different type of enjoyment. I kid myself that I mustn't make either of my two Nicholases jealous, as if they'd even know or care - when I compare them, as I often do. I discovered both men about the same time, and have never regretted being hooked on either. Evans doesn't seem to come out with his next novel as quickly, which is fine, and well worth the wait, but by the same token, I'm never disappointed with Sparks'. I don't always like everything that happens when the movies make the changes they have to, but have enjoyed them as well for the most part. Especially Message in the Bottle and the Notebook, in Sparks'case. For the Horse Whisperer, I was stunned with the movie's ending, and as long as the showing was, I wa still waiting for the real ending to be given. My girlfriend had to say there isn't going to be anymore, Maureen, it's almost over. I'd recommend the books before the movies, which is usually the case, or maybe even the reverse, as then you won't be disillusioned by changes. It's best to treat each as medium result as different entities, entirely I suspect. Take care all, and thanking my daughter Valerie for this opportuniy, to share. Maureen.

I am currently Bummed

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A Break or Two
08/11/2005 12:40 p.m.
Tomorrow I leave for a week's camping trip, after three years or so of not camping. I'm very excited now that we're almost ready and the weather's cooled to reasonable for the last bit of work and loading up, and driving.

A lovely break came last evening when my girlfriend Pat and I got together for dinner and a glass or two of wine, then coffee at a cafe down the street from the restaurant. We had let far too many months slip by without seeing one another.

Pat's a nursing supervisor, does incredible work for the Mission, here in Ottawa, after almost 30 years as a VON travelling nurse, who ended up supervisor and teacher of that and palliative nursing, but then switched to head nurse for the street people or others down on their luck and health (very fatally often) and I so admire her. I've often considered her our Mother Teresa in town, and now I learn people do nickname her that.

She's a writer, poet, prose artist too, and a really dear friend.

We caught up as much as we could in our little time together, and of course the wine hits me so fast, I probably was a bit silly. But needed the relaxing break.
She's worried about my weight, when she first saw me on the front steps when she picked me up she was overtly shocked and thought me ill, and asked right away if I'm alright. She even checked with Ernie on my health. But I wanted to lose this much, and just stay where I'm at.
I take good care of myself, I believe, and honestly feel much better on the light side than heavier. More energetic and springier, and it's handier to be able to move and do things when you're slim. Probably I'll put a little more on, as my doctor advises, but I don't want to go up much.
With me, it creeps fast the other way, so I like to have allowance to play with. But I eat! Well! And treats too!
I'm working on muscle mass, though, with my weights and calcium intake. I know that's incredibly important.
Once I could finally get her off that and diverted her every time she went back to it (nurse and mother that she is) we had lots of other great conversation.

We're so much at the same places in our lives, except she's always been a career woman as well as great mom and wife, and we love the same things - cottages, nature, romance, the arts, writing, church, laughter, cabins and old heritage homesteads, special movies, I could go on and on. She's a true sister of the heart.

So it's off to the campsite tomorrow. I remember plenty of raccoons at that park, but apparently it's not so high a population lately. And there are black rat snakes (harmless but often large) but I'll be off the ground. Our son and daughter won't be though. They have the tent. But they're not concerned about the wildlife.

I know we're moving in on the creatures' territory so I respect that they're there, and it beats Tv, right?

I'll miss you folks but it's well-needed, this change. I'll be off-line sometime after early morning tomorrow.

I'm hoping to write haiku, tanka, journals, poems, and just soak up the scenery and sounds and air, for inspiration. I received my copy of "Gusts" finally, with my pond romance Tanka in it, in the romance section, and was so excited and pleased when I found it. It's Tanka Canada's brand new Tanka Journal, and I'm honoured to be in the company of mentors and leaders in the tanka and haiku styles. Marianne Bluger, (for whom we named the journal after her "gusts" book of Tanka, (I believe I refer to all this in previous entries) Grant Savage, Terry Ann Carter, George Swede, Claudia Coutu and many others I hold in awe. I'll probably re-post that tanka on here when I return as it is one of a pond sequence series I did a while back.

Take good care, all my fellow poets and friends and admin staff, while I'm gone.
I am currently Cheerful
I am listening to Majic l00 in my new headphones on walkman

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Gabrielle Roy's House and Me
08/05/2005 06:30 p.m.
This is me in July '04, in front of the Gabrielle Roy
heritage house in Winnipeg area, Manitoba. Our French-Canadian writer of The Tin Flute and many other literary contributions fame, lived here happily until she was six, when the family, under financial duress, had to leave. She visited it later in life, wrote about it often, and in the loft with the view from the third floor over the street at the front (looking out from this shot) on display was a section from her journals (I believe it was) in her own handwriting, in which she described how often she was inspired while sitting up there looking down on the street. I particularly loved my little time to myself exploring up in the loft, that day, and sensing her presence.

The Fall Out of Window Cleaning
07/21/2005 12:39 p.m.
Though it was lovely having our house power-washed and the windows all cleaned on the exterior by a lad we hired for this, two days ago, this morning I opened the living room drapes to enjoy the front view, while ironing, and soon a sad accident occurred.

It was early, 7:45 am, and I guess because we've got cleaner windows, plus the effect of the sunlight on them at that time, (though this happened to a more minor degree yesterday afternoon too), I soon heard a sudden plunk on the picture window. And down below, outside, sure enough, was a victim of our project.

An adult robin - maybe a little stunned, but it was the wing that I could see was affected from the impact. I watched him for a while, and felt guilty and disturbed about it (Hey, I just had to remove a dead mouse the other day from a house I've been watching and they had mouse traps for a problem with that) enough is enough for this frail heart. He was nervous of me near him, so I kept my distance and he was soon active except for having a bent wing.

He hopped around, then tested his wing, and I guess he'd been favouring it from the stun but it wasn't as bad off as I'd feared, and soon the bird flew away.

Meanwhile I was asking a neighbour what I should do, call wildlife authorities, etc, and looking on the net.

It's a common dilemma, more gruesome and massively injurious and deadly with tower office buildings of course, but our residences cause problems too.

I believed there must be some quick first-aid or support measure the homeowner could provide for the immediate emergency. I did find this on the Google search. So I thought I'd post it.

There were ideas like hanging fake hawks in the window, but I haven't imagined where I'd find one, and will have to mull that over. Glow in the dark stickers were recommended too, not that that's what you really aspire to when you have clean windows, but hey, we have priorities.
Precious creatures are important.

Meanwhile, some of you might like to know about this idea.

"If a bird hits your window and is stunned, put it in a shoebox with holes and a soft towel. In many cases, birds are just stunned and need some quiet time to recover in a dark place. If the bird is more seriously injured and it is a native species, you can decide if you want to contact Wildlife Authorities or the Humane Society. Many songbirds do not recover from injuries beyond stuns."



I am currently Bummed
I am listening to buses and cars

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Befores and Afters
04/18/2005 02:28 p.m.
Watching Larry King’s interview with Jane Fonda last evening, I was refreshed by her approach to the subject of her feelings for Ted Turner, her ex-husband, and how some of the “other women” before and after her, relate to him and to each other. Her predecessor with him, gave Fonda (not out of sarcasm or condescension, but sincerity )tip cards on things to know in relating to him, and Jane herself admits she still loves him, and always will, even if their “romance” is long over. And she believes he still loves her too, though they are not in the arena of love together now. She also has not been adverse to offering any support to his partners, taking up the role she enjoyed.

Like Vadim, John Derek, etc. some men (not necessarily Svengali types) have this ability to forever hold a place in a woman’s heart, not necessarily every woman with whom they had a relationship though, I'm sure, and also keep one in their own, for the respective women. It’s not as if these guys have a harem, not even necessarily that they have a power or control that is intentional. An unforgettable effect is how I like to think of it, that causes such a bond. It can also happen the other way around of course.

The women who've loved such men seem to feel unthreatened and non-competitive for the most part, by their successors or predecessors. Or even just the newer close female friends that come into the man's life. Partly I think this is due to a strong sense of sisterhood in modern women, maturity and growing up, a relaxation of the compelling need and probably myth of having to be “the one and only.” It’s more realistic, if seemingly less romantic.

Perhaps it’s also due a belief in the fact that a person can love more than one other person at a time, (not that intimacy with more than one at a time is being promoted or is under consideration) but that emotionally loving more than one at once is in the realm of credibility to them.

Whether very many “sisters” are prepared to provide or receive tip cards etc. or advice, is debatable, and probably doubtful, or to help choose the next woman, (though this happens sometimes too, ie purportedly Camilla suggested and encouraged Charles’ choice of Diana as bride, though a sense of sisterhood certainly didn’t follow).

And the bond of friendship that a former relationship simmers to, brings to mind some of the issues in the movie My Best Friend’s Wedding.

In any case, I found it refreshing that Fonda express this mature and gracious approach in her newer role with Turner, while maintaining that it is important to honour and foster the close ties with someone you’ve once been in love with, and for whom you’ll always care. Perhaps in a deeper way, even, with the other dressings and demands now retired. And when asked if she’d been taken as “pining” for the “estranged” partner or relationship, she made it emphatically clear to King and to the viewers, that she never “pines.” I really appreciated that statement.

There is a great difference between pining and making respectful acknowledgment of a truth. Addressing the new or potential close people in a former partner’s life, and even their “new story,” when done honestly and after the blessings of some distance and time for closure to heal, does not mean pining, but witnessing, and accepting the change graciously and realistically. It also does not mean obsessing or acting out wistfully or jealously - but perhaps it can only be taken as such, if the former partner and their new interests are receptive and comfortable with maintaining the communications. And ego does not intercede in any of the parties, to affect the healthy balance. Fonda summed up why she would feel like "helping out" her successors with Turner as simply because of her love for him, and her desire for him to be caref for, well-companioned, and happy. My latest poem posted, "After the Hiatus" reflects some of these observations.

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