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after spotting your car on williams st. + the panic that ensued

by Lauren Singer

when do you think of me?
is it after you shower
and you towel off in front of the mirror
and i am not there to kiss the beads of water
from your shoulder blades?
does your skin quake to remember
such tenderness?

do you take walks by yourself
and pretend to fall into the unison
of our blended shadows? do you talk
to yourself and imagine my answers?

i find you in spells of panic,
where i awake abruptly, nearly certain
that you have been beside me,
that the television was your voice all along,
and this terrible thing had never happened.

what a wicked reminder it is
to walk past you and not look at you,
to turn my head for fear that you might see me,
and that you will immediately recognize the
bold punctuation in my sinking chest
that is the loss of you,

so great and immediate
that i clutch my stomach just to think of you,
wishing i had never known this hurt,
never known you at all.

05/19/2010

Posted on 05/20/2010
Copyright © 2024 Lauren Singer

Member Comments on this Poem
Posted by Gabriel Ricard on 05/20/10 at 02:49 PM

Great ending. A wonderful train-of-thought piece.

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