i don't know why she still comes around.
it's not like we can drink anymore,
because she can't spend the night.
she lingers by the doorway in a jacket
i don't recognize and i'm not trying to
make this harder for her, but i turned the
pictures around and i stuffed the gas mask in the trunk,
because even breathing is hard if it's going to remind me of her.
i don't know why she bothers staying for two hours
and then slinking away when no one notices
because her exits are meant to be muted.
it isn't fair for me to be so cruel to her
but doesn't she know how terribly lonely it is
to wake up with such an ache? to force a hate
upon myself for lack of better motive?
i don't know why i let her do this,
how she got this hold over me no man
has ever had the right to.
we don't even try to hug anymore.
i just hide behind the door while
she runs down the stairs and not until
i hear her car groan down eastern ave
do i collapse in on myself and
tally up my sentimental bruises
in this tirade of loneliness.

03/11/2010

Posted on 03/11/2010
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