Sometimes I think,
In his eyes I’m a bother
A number 355
out of many on his list,
sometimes I feel like I don’t exist.

How come I feel
like I don’t have a chance
the odds are against me
as always,
no dance

to look into his eyes
and know that I’m safe
to not be rejected
why can’t I believe?

That sometimes dreams come true
Though never to me,
I’ll meet him in july and
then as always, I’ll flee.

I'm already scared,
Petrification infected,
making a trip for one man
and probably be rejected.

With tears in my eyes,
I know what’s to come,
It’s happened before,
The look of disappointment
When he sees me before him,

Will only justify what’s happened
Time and time again.
But if he says "don’t run" and takes my hand
I’ll start to circle him,
because I won’t understand.

They run, they all do
It’s not me they desire
All my passion, my intelligence
My kindness, my fire.
It doesn’t matter to men,
they don't look inside,
All these things that I am

06/01/2003

Author's Note: it's rough and I'm leaving it that way, sometimes you just have to....

Posted on 06/01/2003
Copyright © 2024 Jennifer L Banks