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Or Were You Sent to Save Me?
by Amanda L MarronDont know where this comes from
Cant change this channel in my head
From the perpetual replay of our memories
I can hear you say my name
How I love the way it slides off your tongue
Your voice reverberates in me
I can hear your intonation in the lyrics
As I listen to the songs we used to sing
I feel your gaze on me
Even though you are miles away
Dark eyes with a shimmer of gold
I remember how mystified I felt the first time
Your glance connected with mine
I still remember all the words you said to me
Of knowledge, of advice, of understanding
The very thought of you is motivation
An assurance that the unsound occurrences
Will fade away as long as I keep on striving
My heart orbits around the thoughts of you
Driving me into a smitten whirl
08/10/2004 Author's Note: for LRCR
Received high merit from www.poeticpower.com 's Fall 2004 contest....still waiting to see if it made top 10
Posted on 08/11/2004
Copyright © 2024 Amanda L Marron
| Member Comments on this Poem |
| Posted by Rachelle Howe on 08/23/04 at 11:24 PM i see a girl with flowers in her hair twirling, arms outstretched, head up toward the sky, eyes closed. i know that wasn't the image in the piece, but that's the feel. make sense? |
| Posted by Richard Paez on 09/08/04 at 09:01 PM I like how although each verse flows into the next, each is very compact, like a little poem in of itself. I especially like how you broke one verse almost in half and made it into the first and last stanzas. I read the whole thing through once, and then went back reading the first 3 and last 2 lines as both a first verse and a last verse... a great structure. I also especially like how past and future tenses are combined in each verse, each tells its own story about what happened and what is/what will happen. A smooth and well crafted piece, Amanda, thank you for sharing this. |m| |
| Posted by Mike Loftis on 09/09/04 at 03:33 AM I was really enjoying this poem until the last two lines. When I read the ending I was blown away. Great way to end a great poem. |
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