Tsarist Amerika
07/17/2009 05:39 a.m.
Friends and Countrymen,

Either I seethe endlessly or I channel it into satirical humor....

Obama Appoints Chicken Czar

Little Rock, AK - President Barack Obama today named Blythe Rutherford Tyson III to head the poultry division at the Department of Agriculture. Stressing a need for aggressive new regulation of range free, spa raised chickens, he cited Mr. Tyson's thirty years running his family poultry business and as chairman of the Chicago Mercantile Exchange's fowl division as reasons for the selection. The post of Chicken Czar will join the ninety-two other Obama appointed Czars and be managed by the Office of Czar Administration (aka, the "Czar Czar"). Republicans have chaffed at the idea of adding even more Czars, but their amendment to HR3105 recommending combining the Chicken Czar, the Salad Czar, freshly ground parmesan cheese, croutons, arugala and endive into one powerful "Chicken Caesar Czar" failed a floor vote earlier this week.
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