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forsaking the dove

by Elizabeth Jill

________________________

it only takes one moment
to recognize a thousand
words are such warheads

it only takes one hatred
to implement a thousand
guillotine masters

twisted tangled pest
I keep waiting for this vine
choking me to death

it only takes one less sin
to chest-thump in righteousness
expert at truth now

there's only the trombone
piccolos now silented
choked to death ceded

it only takes one moment
to massacre a thousand
forsaking the dove

________________________

01/10/2006

Author's Note: This poem is a trinity, so can be read three ways: as is / bypassing the italics / and reading only the italics. [+ tipping into a haiku, as poems, mine, oft tend to do +]

Posted on 01/23/2006
Copyright © 2010 Elizabeth Jill

Member Comments on this Poem
Posted by Mara Meade on 01/23/06 at 01:52 PM

Incredible form, imagery, creativity and thoughts...

Posted by Kristina Woodhill on 01/23/06 at 06:23 PM

I liked reading it all three ways. Sad truths here - how precarious is peace.

Posted by Jon Kary on 01/23/06 at 06:31 PM

Writing in three dimensions like this requires exceptional skill. It is a gift given to a variety of personalities; all tastes can experience the sweetness of words here.

Posted by Charles E Minshall on 01/24/06 at 12:07 AM

Nice piece of writing Jill. Interesting work...Charlie

Posted by Holly H Dunne on 01/24/06 at 02:32 PM

wow, you command a real skill with your words. powerful piece. well done! x

Posted by Gregory O'Neill on 01/25/06 at 12:29 PM

A poem to spend time will. Rather mesmerizing and most insightful. What a great title. Brilliant write.

Posted by Michelle Angelini on 02/07/06 at 02:52 PM

Jill, I can sense your gentle spirit in each of these words and lines. And in the sadness and despair, also a plea for change, peace, and to stop and think before "forsaking the dove."
~Chelle~

Posted by Jim Benz on 03/10/06 at 10:54 AM

well done, no matter which way it's read. This is the just the sort of creativity (and passion) I look for in poetry.

Posted by Mary Ellen Smith on 04/21/06 at 02:13 PM

Such creativity at work here!

Posted by Laura Doom on 10/06/06 at 06:56 AM

I appreciate the care in attention to detail in all your poetry. I'm intrigued by two details here. It's obvious that 'silented' is a deliberate aberration, and I'm wondering whether it's a metrical or a semantic consideration. Idiosyncracy? Secondly, I would have, typically, addressed this subject applying a piledriver to the keyboard, leaving the question of justification for moral judgements (by both reader and writer) until last. This placement is infinitely more subtle :>
Feasting on your darkened fare.

Posted by Soulo Jacob Bourgeau on 01/27/07 at 09:03 PM

This is absolutely marvelous. An instant favorite. How did I miss this?

Posted by Soulo Jacob Bourgeau on 01/27/07 at 09:05 PM

Fantastic on so many levels. Wow.

Posted by Mike Loftis on 06/07/07 at 09:46 PM

This is very excellent. I especially like the stanza there's only the trombone piccolos now silented choked to death ceded

Posted by Jean Mollett on 06/23/07 at 06:37 PM

Hi Elizabeth, Great write. I also agree with Michelle and some of the others too. :)

Posted by El McCandless on 07/09/07 at 08:46 PM

Brilliant in several ways. Wonderful write and read. A form I would very much like to entertain myself. Thank you for the inspiration.

Posted by Barbara Penryn on 12/17/07 at 02:14 PM

I particularly like the second stanza. Well done.

Posted by Joan Serratelli on 02/16/09 at 02:01 PM

Again, your cretivity astounds me. I read it all ways and got ifferent things with each read. GREAT job!

Posted by Philip F De Pinto on 03/31/09 at 07:57 AM

it takes but one moment to realize that words are for the gathering in the baskets of our souls to reflect us for worse or better and a poem such as this, which is about love, is to the expectant heart, the much anticipated letter.

Posted by Glenn Currier on 08/02/09 at 05:21 PM

Besides being a brilliant and sensitive poem, it invites me to consider the power of words and intention. All to easy to forsake the dove in favor of ego. You challenge me to work at relationship. Thanks for a wonder of a poem.

Posted by Phil P Robson on 11/04/09 at 04:51 PM

3 in 1, that is what I call good value! A very creative effort which builds images effortlessly. Very enjoyable

Posted by Daniel M Ridges on 12/21/09 at 09:52 AM

I can't believe I missed this. I'm glad I found it, though. This is a masterpiece, Harvey. Just what I needed to start the day!

Posted by Alison McKenzie on 12/21/09 at 12:29 PM

This is so far beyond brilliant!

Posted by Gregory O'Neill on 12/21/09 at 02:15 PM

...the dove also rises!

Posted by Clara Mae Gregory on 12/21/09 at 03:25 PM

There is definately a poignant truth entwined in these profound words. Great write

Posted by Amie Golda on 12/21/09 at 09:16 PM

Amazing form and great imagery laced with truth. Well done :)

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